16 Months

16 very long months ago is when I figure I last slept more then 5 consecutive hours. I came up with this number by figuring that in the last 5 months of pregnancy I was up every 3 hours to pee or change position which was not a graceful feet. Nathan has in his 11 months of life not slept for longer then 7 and that only happened once on a day when he went o bed at 7 and I stayed up till 11 so it didn't benefit me any. Generally he sleeps for only 4 at a time. I am Tired. reaching physical exhaustion. I just want to sleep. I don't know why but my very Sweet little boy just won't let me. I feel we have tried every thing. Let him cry it out. Go in and comfort him but don't touch him, just give him his nuk. It doesn't work. None of it. I was given the suggestion to set my alarm and wake him up to feed so he will learn to sleep till I get him and gradually extend the time. Great idea and one that I had never heard of- so I try it. Setting my alarm for 3.75 hours from when he goes down - he decided to only sleep 3 hours that night. He has no consistency so I find this very challenging.

So now we have decided that is time to ween the boy, at least this way I don't have to be the one to get up with him- on the weekend Fred can have a turn. It is not going so well. He is very stubborn. Since going to bed at 8 he has been up at 12:30 - 1:40 and 4:44 till now at 6:20 and he is showing no signs of settling any time soon. He doesn't just wake up and cry nicely or talk to himself - nope my boy wails at the top of his lungs on and off. Just when you have hope he may have fallen asleep - he starts again. Not fun when we have a 2.5 year old who sleeps just down the hall. Thankfully for the most part Samantha has learned to sleep through it. I wish I could do the same. I feel like I am just dragging. My house isn't very clean, it takes me days to get the laundry done and we have been eating far more often cause I can't think of what to make, add to this I have decided I need to give up coke. I am in rough shape. I feel like Samantha is probably getting a crappy deal. I am not being very creative and fun with her. I am just so tired.